66 Days - There's No Crying In CrossFit

It was 6am on a Tuesday morning, Eric's class. I stared at the 180 lb tire at a complete loss. It was the first time in my 'CrossFit career' that I legitimately thought that what was being asked of me was not physically possible. After finishing 70 burpees, 60 sit ups, 50 kettle bell swings, 40 pull up attemps, 30 push ups with some sprinting mixed in, I was now to flip this tire 10 times.

"How many times have you flipped it, Summer?" I heard Eric bark.

I shook my head. "I can't get it off the ground."

"Not with THAT attitude you won't."

Tears streamed down my face. Was I really crying? I wasn't hurt, I deserved to be yelled at, I was just frustrated. I had so far to go with this on so many levels.

That became even more apparent to me when I walked into the CrossFit Level 1 Running Certification on Saturday morning. It was nice to be doing this with Kellie because I was nervous, for a multitude of reasons. First off, I am Carl Borg's girlfriend and beyond being in a relationship with him, I have had an infinite amount of respect for him and what he does for a very long time. I felt like there might be expectations of me, or people judging me just a little bit more. The biggest fear though was coming face to face with my weaknesses. Running was sacred to me. It was the one area where I could excel in CrossFit. Breaking that down and learning that I might not be as good as I thought I was, terrified me.

The weekend consisted of lectures and drills by Carl and his partner in crime, Brian Mackenzie. It would take an entire blog in and of itself to describe everything that I learned, but I will definitely say that my view of running and how to do it has changed dramatically. I never thought that it would feel so differently than what I had been doing all my life. In a way, it was as if I was putting my left foot into my right shoe.

On Friday, I head out to Ojai for the Coyote Two Moon 100k. I feel very disoriented going into this. The course itself is ridiculous and beyond that, my head is spinning with new knowledge, new ideas. I think this weekend is going to take me back to the root of what ultrarunning is all about. Where skill is important, it is the mind that loses or wins in a race like this.

I stared at that tire this morning. There HAD to be a way... there just had to. Before too long, Joe came over to help me. He stuck his foot underneath it just enough for me to get a grip, and I did 10 flips.

"You did it." said Eric.

"I had to have help."

He shrugged. "Everyone had to modify something. The point is that you did it. You never want to see the letters 'DNF' next to your name on that board."

I nodded. There was still so much for me to learn and figure out how to apply. The point is that I don't give up and that I trust the knowledge of those that have gone down this road before me. Most people take the easy, rolling 5k fire road. The people that I know go barrelling through a 100 miler at 50,000 feet of elevation change on an unmarked trail with no aid stations. All I have to do is figure out how to keep up.